More changes!!...Big ones.

This picture is from a recent zip line tour I went on. Great fun! I just think this scene is so beautiful and since I couldn't get it without our guide being in it, I just went ahead and got a picture of him, too. I really have no reason to throw this picture in here other than the fact that the first picture I post ends up being the picture that shows up on Facebook when I post this to Facebook and since I want to show a couple of other pictures later on in this post that I do not think make very nice pictures for the lead picture, I just had to pick a pretty one to start with.

I went to the doctor today and had another CT scan which showed that the cancer is progressing. There are two lesions on my liver that my doctor has been following. One of them has almost doubled in size and the cancer in my lungs is also progressing. I was taken off the clinical trial and ended up not receiving treatment today.

We have been waiting for results of a genetics test to see if another experimental treatment would work for me. Those results have come in and I am not a candidate for that treatment. There are really no good options left for me at this point. I could go back on the Folfoxiri treatment, the original chemotherapy I started on. It failed after I stopped taking one of the drugs, Oxaliplatin, and I had to stop that one because it causes neuropathy and it was getting bad enough that if we did not stop, the neuropathy would become permanent. So we could go back to that treatment, it would probably work for a little while but the neuropathy would be permanent and all of the other side effects of that very aggressive treatment would probably hit me much worse than it did before because my body is already worn down.

I am not really interested in that plan because while it might buy me more time, the quality of that time I do not think would be worth it. It isn't a plan that could ultimately cure the cancer, so it would really just delay things a short while, but the cost (physically, emotionally) would be high.

There is a new drug that has just hit the market. It is one that is suppose to be very similar to the 5 Fluorouracil that was also one of my original drugs, but it is suppose to be tolerated quite well. Given the aggressiveness of my cancer, my doctor does not think that it alone would be enough to reduce the cancer. It can be taken in conjunction with the other drugs I was on, but as I have mentioned, I am not really interested in going back on them. However, it might be enough to just keep the cancer from progressing for at least a little while. My doctor is hoping it could give me another 4-6 months. Since I really have nothing to lose, I am going to start taking that one as soon as possible, hopefully next Monday.

This drug has an interesting dosing schedule. It is a pill taken twice daily Monday through Friday for two weeks and then you are off it for two weeks. I'll let you know how it goes.

Sadly, now that I am no longer on the clinical trial, I will no longer be taking panitumumab which has the amazing side effect of giving me these lashes:

I don't think this picture quite does them justice. I currently have the thickest, longest, curliest lashes you ever saw! I tell you, women everywhere are envying me right now. When I first realized what I had going on here, I thought they were my new and improved lashes that were replacing the ones that had fallen out from chemo. People always say that when your hair grows back, you never know what you are going to get. People with straight hair can end up with curly hair, the color can change, etc. So when I saw these lashes I thought I just lucked out with my new replacement lashes! But then I went to the doctor and she noticed them right away and said, "You got your panitumumab lashes!" I was very disappointed to learn that this was a side effect and not a new permanent thing. And I really never expected that I would stop taking this drug so soon! I guess I will just have to enjoy them for as long as I can.

A while ago I happened to notice a bunch of my drugs sitting on our kitchen counter and was a bit amazed at the drug collection I have accumulated. I was beginning to feel as though I was single handedly keeping my pharmacy in business. So I rounded up all my prescriptions and took a picture. It is fairly impressive, especially for me given that I would have to be told to take a Tylenol if I had a headache since the thought of taking a drug never came to my mind on my own. And I can't tell you how many conversations I have had with my doctor that go something like this:

Me: My coughing is getting worse, (or fill in any symptom here, like I said, this is a regular conversation) it is really beginning to bother me.

Doctor: Have you been taking such and such medicine that I prescribed last time?

Me: Why no, I haven't even gotten that one filled. Is that the symptom that drug was suppose to fix?

Doctor: Yes it is, why don't you try taking it this time?

Yeah, I'm not so into taking medication. So I was pretty impressed with what I have accumulated. Here it is:

The good news is, since most of those are to combat the side effects of the chemo drugs, now that I won't be taking those chemo drugs, I won't have to take most of these, either!

Today my doctor asked me what was still on my bucket list. I must confess, I have been doing a pretty good job of checking those things off! So when I said I wasn't really sure (as far as within this country goes) she said she thinks I should have another dance party. (She was quite impressed with my birthday party this past year.) I told her I was already working on my next birthday party but then realized how ridiculous that sounds given that my birthday is still 4 months away, not so good when you may only have 4-6 months. She said I should plan 2 parties, one for the real birthday (and this next year will be a REAL birthday) and another in December, just to cover all bases. We got a good laugh about that one. Basically, my doctor ordered me to have two parties. So if anyone has any great party ideas, if I am going to follow doctors orders, I need to start planning a birthday party!

Well, I will let you know when I start taking my new drug and let you know how it is going.